Making A Choice

It has been awhile since my last post here, and I just feel that somehow I got to a point in my life when I can say that I have to make a choice of either to be alone or to be with someone else until the day I die.

After all that has passed of trying to fix my life again, knowing that somehow, I needed someone to fill the empty space in my heart and complete my life, I came up with a thought that maybe, just maybe, I am bound to be alone.

People always doubt me, misinterpret me, scorn me just because of the wrong things I did in the past, and it is hard to convince them anymore. Or maybe because I am such a bad person that I cannot live with someone without hurting that someone in return. I am the real problem.

I just feel that I cannot take it anymore.

The Problem of Evil - Rebuttal

A world containing creatures who are significantly free (and freely perform more good than evil actions) is more valuable, all else being equal, than a world containing no free creatures at all. Now God can create free creatures, but He can't cause or determine them to do only what is right. For if He does so, then they aren't significantly free after all; they do not do what is right freely. To create creatures
capable of moral good, therefore, He must create creatures capable of moral evil; and He can't give these creatures the freedom to perform evil and at the same time prevent them from doing so. As it turned out, sadly enough, some of the free creatures God created went wrong in the exercise of their freedom; this is the source of moral evil.
The fact that free creatures sometimes go wrong, however, counts neither against God's omnipotence nor against His goodness; for He could have forestalled the occurrence of moral evil only by removing the possibility of moral good.

Worlds Apart

At times, I find myself immersed in some distant memories of her. Right there where she stood smiling at me while I played the guitar. It seems to me that more than a decade has passed while our world's drifted apart. Yes. Our worlds drifted apart.

But I could have never imagined the day when our seemingly endless paths would cross again. And as I ponder upon the possibilities of bridging the gap between our worlds, the complexities of the world beckoned like a bright candle amidst the darkness of the night. For this soul of mine might have grown too tired, and this gentle heart might have grown too weary of the fights. Let the winds of fate direct me to where these troubles are pacified, and let me lie awake, untainted in solitude.

Let It Rain

If you'll ever ask me about ever stepping back into the rain again, I bet my answer would be the same. What I only have right now is a cold sense of things, and sentimentality has eluded me ever since. Love is another story.

I don't wanna be alone under the rain, unless you come join me and lets enjoy every raindrop that falls from the heavens, never caring about anything around us.

Demon

"I have been there for you since the beginning, but I have never been with you from the very start. You know, though, that I've always been a part of you. I am a part of you, from the marrow to the tips of your fingers. I have remained imprisoned within the deepest recesses of your soul, and only my distant whispers enchant you from time to time. You have silenced my every call and hindered me to take control of every act you made. You have shunned me into the shadows and kept me leashed, while you fervently followed the Rule. In the darkest of your days I was there, giving my hand but your very light resisted.

I am waiting for you to take a chance. Release me and I promise you that I will trouble you no more. Give me the chance to give you your darkness - to do the things that you aspired; your very temptations. Let me be the fire that will fuel your darkest desires and malevolent obsessions which you have wanted to do for so long. For once in your life, release this darkness that you have within you,and who knows, light may finally fill this empty space. But until then, I will remain. Its just a matter of time."

Astral Projection

I stood there, watching the waves wash away the shore. For a moment, a slight breeze cradled my senses and brought them into a place in time. I could still hear the laughs of those hearts who were blessed by such a sight. There I saw two people take their vows of love in defiance of time. There I saw clouds encircle them, spreading the warmth of the summer sun, assuring them of an unshaken strength through the coming years. There I saw them, with all the promises of an unending dedication, devotion, commitment and love for one another. There I saw them. Then everything stopped - a fragment of a second seemingly stretched to eternity, as I fall back into a vertigo of unredeemed images that pulls me back against my volition.

Unending.

The Real Joker

Life is unpredictable most of the time, and things usually come unexpected. You are left then to decide on what will be your next move, whether to embrace or resist. These past days, I have seen a couple of unexpected things-things that should have had never come. And though I may go against these with such futility, the inevitability of their manifestations are, to me, as bright as the noonday sun. I find myself amused in disbelief. If this happened way back then, it would been a different story.

Life really has quite a sense of humor.